Patum Peperium, the Gentleman’s Relish
Back on food, and I hadn’t sampled Patum Peperium before the beginning of this year. Plenty of people in this country remember it as a store cupboard staple when they were growing up, whether they liked it or not. Sadly, it wasn’t an item on me old Ma’s shopping list. Saying that, it’s not particularly widely available now and I don’t have any perception of it being more so when I was a kid.
So I had very little idea of what to expect when my delivery arrived from an online deli other than Gentleman’s Relish was a fermented, spiced anchovy paste whose secret recipe 
dates back astonishingly to 1828 and whose perfect partner is hot, buttered toast. Deciding to do it the traditional way I popped the top off the small, white plastic pot and spread a little on the corner of a sippet of toast. Wow! This stuff is potent. The saltiness hits you straight away, but the intensity of the fermented anchovy creeps up and keeps creeping up, similar to a first Marmite experience (which in turn is like a near-death experience). But this crescendo peaked and I began to find myself enjoying it thoroughly. Yes, these are very strong flavours but not severe. The intensity of its fishiness is comparable with that of Thai shrimp paste (if you’ve ever sampled that straight from the tub) and the spice is well balanced. On texture, well it is exceptionally salty to the extent of being grainy, but Patum Peperium is good, ballsy stuff, befitting of any gentleman’s breakfast table.
Actually, I think that’s what might entertain me the most, that in a world where peasant foods have become that of the elite, (oysters, monkfish, cassoulet, etc) Gentleman’s Relish has done the reverse. Originally designed for the bow-tied hoi polloi, Patum Peperium is ours for a couple of quid a pot. Although, it is still best served with the morning broadsheet, ironed by one’s butler.
GDave
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GDave,
I always think of the ’something for the weekend, sir?’ sketch when I see this! Great post, I’ve put my order in with the butler!
Miles
Comment by Miles − on May 31, 2009 at 9:52 pm
Miles,
Suit you, Sir. I did try and steer away from the connotations but it’s pretty impossible at the end of the day. Thanks for the comment.
GDave
Comment by greedydave − on May 31, 2009 at 10:41 pm
Best of luck with the site Dave
Cheers
Rod
Comment by Rod − on Jun 1, 2009 at 7:25 am
GDave,
I’m not sure whether to call you G or Dave or Gentlewoman’s Relish?
Cid
Comment by Cid − on Jun 1, 2009 at 5:37 pm
GDave,
I’ve been out of the loop the past week or so, but I’m thrilled to find your pub open for business upon my return. You know, sometimes life just gets in the way of all this transcontinental blogging fun.
Hmmm? Gentleman’s Relish — “fermented, spicy, salty, ballsy and creeps up on you.” Are you sure it shouldn’t be called Randy Relish?
Sounds interesting, nonetheless. Good one, Cid!
Melissa
Comment by Melissa − on Jun 1, 2009 at 8:12 pm
Dave
if these comments are going on unmoderated you might want to consider changing that.
Cheers
Rod
Comment by Rod − on Jun 1, 2009 at 8:23 pm
Rod,
Thank-you for that, you’re a gent.
Moderation was a big consideration. I’d really prefer to do without it but only time will tell. The site itself has been online for quite some time and Akismet and WP-Ban are doing a good job at keeping the bots at bay so far. I like the maths plug-in that you and your kid use so I’ll get that installed if it all goes south.
GDave
Comment by greedydave − on Jun 1, 2009 at 8:56 pm
Cid,
All fixed. I’m now GDave. I remember you coining that one and I quite like it. Makes me sound like a gangsta rapper.
GDave
Comment by greedydave − on Jun 1, 2009 at 8:57 pm
Melissa,
Randy Relish!? I’m beginning to wonder if I misunderstood what Rod said about moderating the blog.
Excellent gag though. Funnily enough, over here Gentleman’s Relish was also the name of a ’specialist adult publication’ so you’re not wide of the mark.
GDave
Comment by greedydave − on Jun 1, 2009 at 8:57 pm
GDave,
I just wanted to add that I’ve taken the time to ramble around your blog, read everything readable and I even checked out your camera equipment. Great beginning to what I know will be a wonderful blog! You’ll love Akismet, by the way. That little program has saved me from literally thousands of spam comments. I’m looking forward to some interesting posts!
Good job, GDave!
Melissa
Comment by Melissa − on Jun 2, 2009 at 2:04 am
Melissa,
I really appreciate your comments. Yours and everyone’s encouragement has really given me a lift. There’s a few teething problems (I thought I’d stress-tested this place
) but nothing major. All the very, very best to you.
GDave
Comment by greedydave − on Jun 2, 2009 at 8:11 pm
GDave,
I’ve just had a browse around your preferred foodie sites and found Chocolate & Zucchini…. guess what, they’re making daifuku which is a sort of sweet Japanese glutenous rice sweet. There’s nothing quite like them elsewhere and it took me a while to get used to the texture and flavour. Whole shops and departments in high end stores are dedicated to this subject and they are often given as gifts so my friends have told me. Never heard of anyone making them but looking at the ingredients, it might be difficult here in the UK. Have you tried any? There’s at least one shop I know in London that specializes in these and who knows maybe Glasgow has an outlet?
Cid
Comment by Cid − on Jun 3, 2009 at 10:11 pm
Cid,
Hey sorry, I’ve been out of the game for a couple of days. I swear I’ve heard the name daifuku before but I can’t think where. They look great! Hey if you want some more reading, these Japanese food reviews by a British ex-pat have kept me entertained for ages. There’s a bit of “language” in there but the writing is so smart and funny.
http://archive.yongfook.com/category/food/food-reviews/
GDave
Comment by greedydave − on Jun 5, 2009 at 10:41 pm
GD- you can get daifuku at Minamoto Kitchoan on Piccadilly in London, next time you’re down in London whenever that might be. Or, if you want to visit Manhattan before my secondment’s up in October, there’s one near Rockefeller Plaza (either the same company or a company with the same name) …. Don’t be a stranger
Comment by Bowlhead_2000 − on Jun 9, 2009 at 4:33 am
Bowlhead,
Cheers for the tip-off and you’re damn right I should get myself down to that there London. I haven’t been since that time we did the West End and the British Museum, which was years ago!
GDave
PS. Was secretly hoping you’d use ‘Guillaume’ as your screen name.
Comment by greedydave − on Jun 9, 2009 at 2:23 pm